Count

12/23/2008

Can stand vs. Cannot stand

In China, I can stand...
  • Lack of personal space - this is the number 1 thing you'll notice in China. In the West, your personal space is basically beyond arms length. In China, it's your shoulder length. Thank God HK is considered in between.
  • Spitting - I've mastered the skill to know when and where the spit is coming from... and ignore it. Trust me, these people have spit in public for decades and they won't miss their target - the ground. Your shoes will be fine, don't worry. Just ignore it.
  • Smoking - most of Chinese men are going to die of lung cancer. I am sure of this. While I do miss the nice clean air in HK and US clubs, it really doesn't bother me that much. And somehow, they don't blow the smoke at you. I'm still perplexed.
  • Drinking games - I'm not sure why the Chinese insist you must get piss drunk to prove that they are good hosts. Since I can act drunk, along with my bright red face, I've been able to duck the most ridiculous drinking games
  • Pushing - see lack of personal space. A side product is where everybody just pushes you all the time when you are lining up (if there is such a thing as a line... most of the time its a mob). I'm not ashamed that I've landed a few special elbows to the groin to those who push me. And my suitcase serves as a good divider in taxi lines. They hit my suitcase with the legs, and I turn around and push the suitcase right up their calves. It'll hurt.
  • Speaking loud - Apparently, they understand "Shut the fuck up"... or maybe it's just my angry tone with a finger on my lips.
  • Squat toilets - no problemo. I can hold it.
  • Attitude - most service industry people don't care about you. All you have to do is yell at them and curse. It works. (Loving the big city, eh? I've been reassured that away from Shanghai, it's much better)
  • Inefficiency - I guess coming from Hong Kong, we can never be satisfied. Luckily, I lived in Chicago and brought expectations to a new low. You see, it's all relative!
Only one thing I cannot stand in China:
  • WHY DO PEOPLE TALK TO YOU WHEN YOU ARE DOING YOUR BUSINESS IN THE LU?
One more, actually:
  • WHY DO PEOPLE TALK TO YOU WHEN YOU ARE DOING YOUR BUSINESS IN THE STALL? I CLOSED THE DOOR ALREADY. SHUT THE FUCK UP!

2 comments:

Laughing Man said...

Oh man, ha ha. Cannot agree more. However...

-They DO blow smoke towards you! I hate it when they exhale and talk at the same time as those little puffs of smoke casually poof out of the person's mouth.

-Protip: be vigilant when drinking Chinese wine in China. It may be fake and you may go blind.

-LOL pushing. People stand so close in a queue that I thought everyone was trying to pickpocket me. Turns out that cutting in line is rampant in China, and people just don't want to lose their spot.

-I wrote about how people talk loud to exaggerate their position in work and life.

Ha ha ha ha, doing anything other than "business" in the toilet is certainly your pet peeve ;)

Anonymous said...

There's so much evil in Africa: wars, ethnic cleansing, child soldiers, slavery (ironic, ain't it), poverty. And the world looks around and is still in search for those big diamonds. Recommended.

-what a dumb stereotypical comment!have you ben to africa or are you regugitating shit you've seen in the media that reinforces these dumb stereotypes?asia has some of the worst human rights abuses so look at the freaking log in your eye before mentioning thw splinter in mine!!!bangkok child prostitures?chinese "democracy"?? you make me rethink my decision to matriculate at Booth! you dumb fuck